For Their Benefit Or Yours?

One of the most difficult aspects of leadership is that leaders, when not paying attention, revert to their ego-centric state. That is, in the normal course of pursuing success, their focus is on themselves—what is and isn’t going the way they want it to go. This prompts decisions of action, wrapped in tone, that are geared more to their own ego needs and less to what their people actually need.

Remember, you as a leader, don’t exist for your own success, but to create an environment for others to be successful. Your success is in their success. Otherwise, you’re just a performer in a leadership position. Tight control, micromanaging and telling people what to do are examples of you meeting your own ego needs, not for the benefit of others.

Your Tone Matters

Add to that your tone, in which your actions are delivered. For instance, some leaders believe that the best way to affect positive movement is a tone that challenges people to reach higher. This is actually a great motivator but can easily cross the line that emphasizes the negative or berates and criticizes others, which destroys motivation.

Other leaders believe that people will respond to encouragement and support to prompt them to higher levels of performance. Again, another great motivator, but this tone can cross a different line. When overused, leaders become overly lenient, allowing underperformance to continue.

It is interesting that leaders who rely on challenging their people are so afraid of becoming overly lenient that they may become more demanding. Those who rely on support and encouragement are afraid of becoming tyrannical, such that even their feedback is given with such gentleness that it is no longer honest.

 What’s Your Approach?

Over the years, you have adapted your actions and tone based on experience and learning. But as long as you are unaware of how much your ego needs are wrapped in your approach; you will have only marginal growth as a leader.

Probably the best indicator that you have successfully stepped beyond your own needs is that people begin to grow and improve. And that will only happen as you become more aware of yourself and make intentional efforts to reach beyond yourself. It is true that self-awareness is your first step in expanding beyond your ego-centric state to being a great leader.