Over the weekend, I listened with interest to a
commentator opine about the value of the so-called golf summit that President
Obama arranged with the vice president and two republican leaders. He stated
that, in the end, nothing of any value would come about as a result of playing
a round of golf together. If the commentator had any clue about human behavior
research, he would have a different opinion.

Social psychology experiments have shown that people who
act in synchrony are more likely to cooperate, even when personal sacrifice is
required. The relational connection, called social attachment, is strengthened
among those in the group, which fosters cooperation. While policy decisions won’t
be made on the 17^th green or in a golf cart, playing together will
loosen the attitudes and increase cooperation among the parties to resolve some
of the nation’s most difficult issues.

It’s the same reason you participate in activities with clients
and prospects. Just applying your technical expertise isn’t enough to create an
environment of trust and openness that you need. Actively engaging others outside
the technical environment will give you an opportunity to be sync with them.

This truth answers the question some professionals ask
when considering whether to attend events and activities beyond their normal
work hours. Those proceedings do matter and will position you differently,
having participated.

But keep in mind three things. First, you can’t attend
everything, so be selective with what you will attend. Put forth effort to
participate in a narrow band of activities that will put you before the same people
numerous times. Narrow and deep is better than wide and shallow.

Second, when participating, initiate interactions with those
clients and prospects with whom you want to strengthen your “social attachment.”  Again, being acquainted with everyone isn’t
as effective as being known by a select few. Over time, as you continue to
participate, you will broaden your relationships naturally.

Third, make sure you follow up with your contacts to reinforce
your interactions. For instance, you could offer to send an article or other
information to a new acquaintance. Having sent the information, follow up again
to make sure the information was received and field any further questions. As
best you can, keep the conversation alive as you demonstrate your character and
competence.

This week, identify the next activity you will attend and select the handful of people you need to connect
with while participating. You may not solve the world’s problems, but you will invigorate
your relationships so that you make a compelling case that they should be your
client.