While attending an accounting firm meeting recently, I heard again the struggle for work/life balance. It has been such a hot topic for the last couple of decades, so you’d think we would have made more progress than we have. It remains a topic of conversation and contention that has permeated every level in the firm.

When I hear people struggle with trying to balance their work and personal lives, I’m struck by how often it’s an either/or proposition. Either you stay and finish the project or go watch your child play soccer. Only two options, and one disappoints the other.

But how did it get to only two options? Before that day, you knew that there was a soccer game and you had a pretty good idea that your project was up against the wall. But because you waited until the last minute to resolve the conflict, it’s too late.

It’s too late to involve others. You can’t, in good conscience, pass off your project to others who are unprepared to work on it because they don’t know about it nor have the time to do it.

It’s too late to renegotiate expectations. If there was any hope of adjusting timelines, commitments and schedules, it’s gone now. By waiting to deal with the conflict, you cut your options to two. Only two.

Instead of waiting, plan ahead. Let people know your situation. Get permission. Get buy-in. Make alternative arrangements. Reschedule. Arrange for coverage. But don’t wait to the last minute when there are only two options.

This won’t solve the conundrum, but if it reduces your stress from imbalance by 15-20%, it will help. Realize that your firm and your family/friends all have their own boundaries and tolerances of what is acceptable, so work within those confines. JUST DON’T WAIT.