Every once in a while, you are faced with the fact that there’s some discipline, habit or practice you KNOW you should start or stop, but you keep delaying it. What’s the first thing that comes to your mind? That’s the one I’m talking about.

You know it holds you back but you just don’t get started. In this case, you need a good talking to—by someone who knows you inside and and out and won’t fall for all your lame excuses. And that person is you.

You know the real message that cuts through all the BS. When you speak of your own inaction to yourself, you know the real reasons you don’t, and often you just haven’t made the hard decision to start (or stop) whatever it is you know you need to do. That’s when you know it’s time to give yourself the talking to that you need to hear.

Believe it or not, there’s a ton of research about talking to yourself. I’m not talking about those for whom it means a prescription for a psychotropic drug. That’s a different thing. I’m speaking of how you communicate with yourself—what you believe and say to yourself.

Studies has shown that talking to yourself as if you were sitting across the table is most effective. Look yourself in the eye and say, “Stop. Just stop. You’ve been meaning to make this change long enough. You know you need to do it, so quit putting it off. Do it now. You’ve made enough excuses. It’s time to draw a line and go forward.”

When you take yourself, your career, your relationships and your happiness seriously, you will give yourself the talking to that will make a difference for you. It’s the only way to get the talking to that will change anything. Do it. Now.